Louise

I just wanted to give a run down on who I am. Well, who I really am. The idea of this blog is simple. We as women always have things rolling around in our heads. Things we never say. Things we never say because we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, we sometimes worry that people won’t think we’re “ladies” because of what we really think, and sometimes we just don’t feel it’s worth expending the energy to say how we feel. That last reason is almost always my reasoning for not saying what I think. Although, I do say what I think probably more often than I should. And that causes people’s feelings to be hurt. Which therefore is the reason why I don’t feel it’s worth the energy the rest of the time.

I’m a 31 (yikes) year old woman living and working in the San Francisco Bay Area. I have a 12 year old son and a boyfriend of 6 years. Yes, 6 years. Is there a marriage in the future? Not a chance in hell. And that’s my decision. I know many women want to be married, to have the dream wedding, the piece of paper that says you’re in a committed relationship. I don’t get down like that. Marriage is not for me. I’m not saying that everyone who is and ever was married is stupid for choosing to get married, I’m simply saying it’s not for me. I’m not religious. I don’t believe in a higher power (except karma), I don’t believe in fairy tales, and I don’t believe that I need a legal document to proclaim my monogamy. Because let’s keep it real: nothing is forever. The Mayans and Nostradamus can back me up on that. I’m always one step ahead of the game. I’d hate break up and have a judge tell me what I can and cannot have. If you’re mature enough to be in a long term committed relationship, you’re mature enough to act like a civilized adult and properly divide what’s been accumulated. And now I’m stepping off my soap box….

Thelma and I have real lives. Obviously, our names are not Thelma and Louise. We have our own blogs in real life with our real lives. Blogs that I will never ever share on here because we choose not to reveal our real selves. Refer to paragraph one in case you need to know why. J We’ve always talked to each other about any and everything. She is truly my best friend. I know that I can tell her anything and she will not judge me. No matter how shady I decide to be at that moment in time. And I don’t know anyone else on the planet like that. Truth be told, I probably never will meet another person like her. I’m good with that. Without getting into an estrogen-filled-cry-me-a-river-I-love-you-so-much type of thing, Thelma means the world to me. I love her more than I love all of my family and friends combined. Excluding my son. I love her as much as I love him. I can honestly say that I don’t know where I would be in my life without her. And I can only say that about one other person; my son. We decided to do this blog because we can’t say stuff that we really want to in our real life blogs.

The more we got to talking, the more we realized that we should definitely make a blog dedicated to this. Not only do we love the idea, but I can guarantee you that most women will love it too. We want to keep it as real as we can. Real names excluded of course. We’re hoping to reach out to women – as many as we can. Hopefully we’ll give women (and maybe men too) a place to vent their thoughts that they don’t want to speak out loud.

My vow to you is that I will always be me. I will not sugar coat anything. Just as I am in real life. I’m known amongst my friends and family as being a little too honest. Which often comes across as mean, but even more often comes off as funny. I can’t promise you that I will always be funny because not everything is funny. We will not let this be a man hating blog. This will be a sound board for us, and hopefully you to let everyone know what it’s like to be a girlfriend, wife, sister, mother, aunt, grandmother, and any and every other hat we wear.

My hats are obviously mother and girlfriend. I am also a sister and aunt. But when I take those hats off, I’m just me. Louise. Louise who cusses a lot- more than my boyfriend likes, Louise who smokes cigarettes – and goes through rings of fire to hide it from her boyfriend and son, Louise who has always wanted to do something with her life. Louise who took broadcast journalism in one of her many high schools and wrote for two school newspapers. Louise who loves to write, but isn’t driven enough to write a novel. I prefer real life. At one point in time I thought it would be awesome to write for a real newspaper, be an anchor woman, or a radio DJ. Instead of following one of those career paths, I had my son right out of high school and put my life on the back burner to attempt to raise my son to be a strong, independent, productive human being.

Now at 31 I’m attending school to work on my AA in business administration. Not exactly the journalist I wanted to be, or the labor and delivery nurse, interior designer, sports medicine doctor, or lawyer that I once wanted to be. But it’s the most practical for me. Maybe in the next life time….

Before I wrap this up I want to acknowledge this one (or few) thing(s). I am real. I know I said this before. But I suppose this is my disclaimer of sorts. I know I’ll most likely piss some of you off with the things I say. And for that I’m not sorry. I whole heartedly intend to be as true to myself as possible because I believe that if you can’t be true to yourself, you will not live a happy life. Thelma and I hope you enjoy, love, hate, and laugh at any and everything said from this point on. And please feel free to contribute any stories. As we are under the Thelma and Louise cloak, so will you. We will NEVER EVER disclose any personal info. I’m ready to get on this roller coaster and let my hat fly as I throw my hands up and go through the loops.

-Louise